idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
