We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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