Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize