Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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