It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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