He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Randomize
