Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
