My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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