If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
