She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
