my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
