So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
well you can't waste a boner
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
false alarm, still single
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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