Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
