Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
