he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
ok first of all what the fuck
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