So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
