Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
