Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
