I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I wish I only lived at night.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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