Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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