Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
