dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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