Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I think my moral compass just broke
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize