Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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