ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
