chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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