It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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