I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
