yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
