I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
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