im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
