The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
