Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
