I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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