is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
i drank out of a bidet.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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