You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize