Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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