Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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