Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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