Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize