I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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