I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
