i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
