i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize