i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
