i permit you to call me
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
