Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
