I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
