After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
