id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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