were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize
